This article is the continuation of our series of articles aimed at helping you understand your “explosions” and to free yourself from your guilt. Here are the links to previous articles, in case you missed them:
– Article 1: Aurélie… or the story of an overwhelmed mother!
– Article 2: I exploded… I yelled at my daughter!
– Article 3: The dark side of Benevolent Parenthood
– Article 4: A flight attendant … to take care of your child with peace of mind
– Article 5: The stress bath theory: the real causes of your uncontrolled anger
– Article 6: Dear guilt: FAREWELL!
I would like to warn you.
If you have read our previous emails “The Stress Tub Theory” and “Dear guilt: FAREWELL!”...
So, you have understood that the causes of your uncontrollable anger and your guilt largely come from your past.
Besides, if you have followed other blogs, other programs, everyone offers methods to explore your past.
And it stops there.
Many “dream sellers” promise mothers in distress that exploring their past will make them feel zen and happy all the time.
This is doubly wrong.
First of all, you cannot be Zen all the time.
It is an empty promise.
You can never be a 100% positive mom, attentive, zen and resourced. It’s impossible.
On the other hand, you can decrease your anger and accept yourself as you are, even when you slip up (and this is what you are taught in the “imperfect… and proud of it” training).
Second, digging into your past is necessary …
But that is not enough.
Admittedly, it is a mandatory step to become a serene mother and to accept yourself as you are.
If you do this job, you will understand a lot.
You will be able to anticipate and reduce your moments of explosion.
But what are you going to do with this understanding, this pastime?
I got stuck in my past for years.
I worked a lot on myself.
It opened my eyes.
I understood that I often repeated the behaviors of my parents.
I understood where my horror of violence (painful experience of my childhood) came from.
I understood that I had built myself with very strong requirements since my childhood.
Somehow I was relieved to realize that my reactions had an explanation.
I understood why my daughter’s violence made me react so much… But I still couldn’t accept seeing myself explode in the face of violence.
I was sad to have built myself with this “burden”.
I was missing a step.
A step to be at peace with my past, and finally choose my adult behaviors.
Fortunately, I have met some great women.
To name just a few.
Their approaches were different.
I trained in their methods, and they taught me to transform my past wounds into life force.
They taught me to take stock of my REAL needs and to choose the behaviors that really do me good today.
(and leave out those who belong to my past)
I have also learned to “shut off my mind” when negative ruminations become too painful.
Today, I am (finally) able to choose my behavior.
I no longer live in the sadness of my heavy emotional baggage.
I go forward.
You can do it too.
And you don’t have to give it years.
If you decide to join the “Imperfect and proud to be” program, then you will:
- Explore your past, to understand where your reactions are coming from – in Modules 1 and 2;
- Learn new behaviors and new ways of thinking, based on who you are today (making peace with your past, and leaving it behind) – in Modules 3 and 4.
You will find in particular the approaches of Nathalie Bridonneau and Lise Bourbeau, who have helped me so much.
Take a look at the content of the program modules by clicking here.
I take this opportunity to share with you a message from Aurore, psychologist, who recently subscribed to “Imperfect and proud to be”… A message that resonates a lot with today’s email…
Click here to choose your formula and register too
To support you in this period where being a parent is even more complicated than usual, we offer you, until next Wednesday -100 € reduction (and -200 € reduction on the DUO formula)!
Take care of yourself !